One of the things that I am grateful for in Buddhism, is the systematic approach towards self healing, self improvements & self fixing. (fixing one’s flaw) This methodological approach had been taught by Buddha more than 2,500 years ago.
Before we can fix a flaw, we need to acknowledge a flaw. It can be our low self esteem, anger management, lack of patience, possessiveness, obsession, laziness, compulsive habits etc. If we believe there is nothing wrong with us, then nothing else can be done. To identify a flaw, one can seek help and opinions from others. Alternatively, is to self reflect with honesty.
Then we need to understand how we end up having such a flaw. The cause of it. This require self honesty. Something which is very difficult. One may get professional help to dig up the cause hidden under layers of false pretense, wrong assumptions, memories etc.
The Buddhist practioners utilise meditation and mind training techniques to search within. To come face to face with themselves.
Ever seen meditators or chanters in retreat and suddenly tears just flowed, followed by a deep sense of self appreciation and self ease? It is a really beautiful process when one is finally able come to terms, know the cause and accept oneself as it is.
Then we must have the desire to fix that flaw and believe that it can be fixed. This is what makes human so precious, we have faith and we believe in things. It is the same belief and faith that makes an aeroplane a reality. This same quality can also help us change ourselves for the better.
Once we cleared ONE and TWO, we have to believe that a cure or a fix is possible.
In order to start fixing ourselves, we must understand there is no Self. A bit of an irony right? self fixing when there is no self to fix…
But look at it simply, if we are not attached to our self principle, personality , characters etc, then it is possible for change and transformation to take place. Otherwise we become our own stumbling block.
I have encountered classmates who lament that they would do better in exams if only they are not BORN LAZY and because they are born lazy, therefore they cannot study….
I have encountered people asking for help in anger management and the next moment they say anger is part of their personality. (They seemed proud of that personality)
Once we understand that whatever flaw we want to fix is not part of our identity, it makes the fixing easier. It makes the self fix process possible.
The most important part is to begin the process of self fix. Only we can change ourselves. The process is difficult. Like chipping off layers of rocks. Our flaws had become our nature, our habit, our personality.
To change them requires determination and consistent effort. We have to be mindful of our habitual thoughts, speech and actions. Then tackle them face on with bravery.
Before we can become Buddha, let’s change ourselves to become better people first.