This is a story that I hope will have a happy ending. Last year, I learned about someone who was battling with his gender identity. Encountering setbacks in life and rejection by his family must have been extremely painful. He was depressed and hoped that Buddhism could help him in some way.
My friend directed him to teachings by many famous masters but unfortunately, the standard Buddhist messages didn’t seem to touch him at all. Although, they all seem logical, sensible and so wise to him; But somehow, there is that invisible barrier. He remained depressed and as the days went by, the bleakness gradually gnawed away his purpose of life.
One fine day, my friend received an email. It was a very nonchalant, thank you for your help kind of email. And by the way, his last day would be that Sunday. WHAT? Well, he had signed up with a program to assist in voluntary termination of life.
Being just an ordinary human, we naturally flipped after reading that email. We just couldn’t understand how there could be a legal clinic offering such services in another part of the world. Why are all the Dharma messages not getting through? What else can we do to help him stay alive?
But for this man, life had lost its meaning. In case you think we should have referred him to a qualified counselor or psychiatrist etc, let me clarify. He had been through all those on his own already and was trying to check out Buddhism as a last resort.
Then I suggested that my friend introduce a famous Japanese monk to him. We do not know this monk personally.
Kodo Nishimura
Replying to his email, my friend asked him not to give up yet. Maybe this monk from Japan can be his inspiration? We send him some websites and links, hoping for the best, and praying that he will be happy, this life or the next. We didn’t hear back from him until a month later. Then he sent another email.
He was thankful to have found a role model and had canceled his suicide plan! What a relief for us and we sincerely hope all the best for him. After all, human life is so precious.
What other living masters couldn’t do, a Japanese monk did, by wearing makeup and heels. Okay, don’t get me wrong here. I am not advocating that every monk should wear makeup. And I am equally aware of conservative Buddhists screaming “Blasphemy” at Kodo Nishimura.
“He is not a monk! He broke the precepts by wearing makeup” said one. “He’s a Mara (Devil) Monk” screamed another. “He is gay!”
And believe me, I understand all these objections too. Because I had received the same programming from conservative Buddhist schools too. I know what the concerns are. My point is, let us be a little bit less judgemental. Be a little bit open-minded.
After all, didn’t the Mahayana scriptures highlight the importance of assuming different roles to help different beings? (Lotus sutra)
May all be well and happy.
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I am just an ordinary guy in Singapore with a passion for Buddhism and I hope to share this passion with the community out there, across the world.
Bodhi-Bowl 
This is upside down thinking. The good news is the outcome yes, he didn’t kill himself and that really is good news. As far as the so called monk in Japan, well this has nothing to do with conservative Buddhism, this kind of thinking is just the support of the Dharma Ending Age instead. Allowing someone to do as they wish has nothing to do with portraying something that isn’t what they claim to portray. Because people see through demonic tricks and is not hookwinked by pretenders does not mean they are discriminating, being judgemental. The Buddha taught the Precepts for a reason and if you are to be a Monastic, you must follow precepts. No one can ever change that. This is also why many Buddhist Lineages around the world don’t consider many Japanese Priest to be monks because they aren’t. They did not renounce the worldly life so they are not monks, you can’t be a monk and still be married. This doesn’t take anything away from them being good teachers if they are, but when we start seeing monks smoke, or drink, or eat meat, or dress like a woman, then it’s all part of the Dharma Ending age. It is one thing to be gay or whatever you want, you will receive the Karma just as anyone else will, however when you pretend to be a monastic, it is one of the 5 gravest offense in Buddhism and the retribution is terrible. That is why I reached out personally to the Japanese guy above once to try and help him so he wouldn’t end up in the hell realm, but his attachment to his desires out weight any logic and reason and he is attached to his fame. Like I said, the only good thing is the young man didn’t kill himself, that’s great. But hopefully he found a true good and wise teacher. Namo Amituofo
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Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I agree that Buddhist monks should adhere to monastic precepts. On the other hand, I also think that such development or degeneration is inevitable. Since the Buddha’s time, Buddhist practices had underwent great changes. And many people today would find a real arhat boring and will not listen to them. In ancient India people respected and celebrated renunciation. Today, many will avoid a monk in tattered robe by the road side but will bow to monks in silk robes. I guess we really need to be wise to see through the outward appearances of a monk in tattered or silk robes. The dharma paths is vast too, I hope that ultimately all will arrive at ultimate happiness even though we set off on our journey through different gates. 🙏
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To your last comment above, As the great Master Hsuan Hua said, the Dharma Age begins with you. In other words, if you try your best and uphold the precepts, then the proper Dharma is still here, but if you don’t, then you are apart of the Dharma Ending Age. So is the Dharma Ending Age inevitable? Of course it is, but as long as you practice Buddhism sincerely, then the Proper Dharma is still alive. Lastly, the Dharma here is the West is just beginning, it is ending currently in the East. Regardless if they have a shiny Robe or Tattered Robe as you say, it’s not the robe we should be looking at but the actions of who is wearing them. Do they hold the Precepts? If you don’t understand the Precepts then you won’t know how to tell a good and wise teacher from the false ones. Good luck sir. Namo Amituofo!
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Amituofo 🙏
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