Being equal

Upekkha – Equinamity towards beings and situations.

Equinimity towards people

I was having dinner with my family and the commotion at another table caught my attention.

A well dressed lady was causing a commotion and being rude to the waitress. Her facial expression says it all. I HATE YOU..! Wow. The vibe was real strong and all the staffs were trying their best to avoid her table. She didn’t care about the explanation from the waitress.

Then a young girl approached that angry woman. There was an immediate transformation as that angry woman changed into a doting mother with the most beautiful smile and loving gaze.

Seems like a two different person to me.

I thought, if only we can treat each other with the utmost love, respect and good will, then this world will be a wonderful place.

However, we know that is easier said then done.

How can we treat stranger with the same kindness and love as our dear families and friends.

More importantly, why should we? What is the advantage for us?

For me, equanimity means achieving a mental equilibrium.

A non judgemental state where I am not burdened by preconceived notion.

For example when I am overseas and a poorly dressed man approached me. My 1st thought is that he is trying to gain something from me. Then my defense mechanism kicks in. It turns out that he was just being kind to alert me that I’ve just dropped some coins while fumbling with the map. I felt embarrassed with myself, then I realised I was frowning the whole time due to my earlier mental defensive mode. I try to smile in appreciation of his kindness. I realised that my forced smile just made me look like an awful sneering jerk….

Equinimity towards situations.

This means we remain in our state of equilibrium no mater what happens around us or happen to us.

It is normal for us to react to what we experience through our senses.

For me, trying to stay in a state of mindfulness is a daily challenging game.

Maintaining a tranquil and peaceful mindset in all situations.

For practitioners of mind training like breathing meditation and mantra recitation, this is one our our favourite daily challenge.

it is almost like a game we play daily.

The rule is simple,

  1. never loose your cool and composure
  2. never loose focus on your topic of concentration (breathe or mantra)
  3. maintain a state of mental equilabrium


Be it an irritating cashier that provides you horrible service or your boss singing your praise in a metting.

Over time, as our practice take root, we will be less likely to be swayed by our external stimulants.

Yor mind ramains non fluttered and at peace. Neither irritated nor elated. That is another way of practicing equinimity.

I think it is useful because it helps me get a grip of myself.

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