Are we happy?

What makes us happy?

I asked myself today.

Then I realized that my happiness revolves around my senses.

I recall the buffet dinner with food stacked high. I recall the movie I just watched over the weekend, going on vacation and seeing beautiful sights. Shopping spree; Yes!

The mental pictures are exactly like a commercial! An imagery of success with all material satisfaction.

Something seems awfully wrong…. This doesn’t seem right…..

The Buddha taught that happiness is the absense of craving and adversion.

Will this really make me happy?

I decided to re-investigate again.

What makes me happy? Hmmmm

Again, I recall the happy moments of vacation, the delicious food at the buffet. The wonderful feeling of achievement from a shopping spree. Watching movie…

But this time, I remember something else.

I remember the soreness and tired feet from vacation, the dissatisfaction of a tourist spot and the yearning to look for another photo perfect spot. Only to discover everywhere I go, there is this yearning for some place better. Some place more scenic.

I remember the indigestion caused by the craving to taste every single dish on the long buffet table. The craving to try one more dessert and a sense of regret for not tasting one more piece of cake. Oh I did not try that chocolate ice cream last night!

My memory of what cause happiness was flawed. My tricky mind had hidden the unpleasant and shown only the glitzy advertorials of material happiness.

My mind show me happiness as taught by the world.  Exactly like a TV commercial.

The world taught us to look externally for something new to excite our senses. When we get bored, we look for something new. Always seeking but never satisfied.

If craving and aversion is absent, will we be happy?

I think that will be true happiness.

That is what Buddha realised and taught.

This type of happiness is not on commercials.

This type of happiness is not taught in school.

I guess I need to re-learn what happiness is.

Am I truly happy? Unfortunately not, because craving and aversion is still present.

I guess, its back to the meditation cushion. Learning true happiness.