I read about negative people recently and it reminded me of some people. In my experience, the negativity is so strong that it corrupts others and drives a wedge into the heart of the community. Being clueless, these people believed that they are being helpful.
Here’s some characteristic about negative people that I found on the internet.
There is always a risk when we try to stick a label onto people because that will have an effect on ourselves too.
However, it is important to be aware of them, know what it means when we encounter negative people and of course we also have to check ourselves from being negative too.
Delusion
Negative people imagine the worst outcome. They live in constant fear of something bad. They “enjoy” such a view because they believe it is being smart, being prepared for the worst. While it is true that we should not be muddle headed in life, it is also equally valid not to live our life in fear.
It is important to note that the key word is imaginative. In the Buddhist concept, that means illusionary which equals to Ignorance and therefore a cause of suffering.
As a Buddhist, it will be good if we can help allay their fear, once we know that they are delusional. However, this can be very challenging because they “thrive” and take pride in their fear as explained previously.
They had mislabeled their delusion as wisdom.
The next best thing we can do is to make sure that we are not “contaminated” by their fear.
We must have mindfulness and have the wisdom to recognize and reject negativities.
Contamination
Negative people can have goodwill too. Since they perceive danger, they feel that it is their duty to warn others. They will try to paint the worst scenario and share their contaminated vision with others.
You will be surprised that most negative people are very good influencer. They smile and build convincing conversation. Since everything is imaginative, they are very good talebearer too. Their speech cannot be trusted because it is basically based on their tainted speculations.
They try to influence you against certain decision or influence you against the decision maker in an organization.
It is important to note that just like a disease, it does not come with an antidote on its own. When you ask them for a solution, they will simply tell you that the solution is “Don’t do it!”
From a Buddhist perspective, it is important that we do not participate in that contamination.
Spread wisdom and not ignorance. Whatever we hear, never repeat it to another person unless we have the absolute fact. In another word, do not be easily influenced.
Rejoices at the wrong cause.
Negative people like to collect news on failures and bad situations. To build their case, they are constantly on lookout for information to justify their negativities.
They can’t wait for their worst nightmare to manifest. Remember, negative people are just interested in being negative without offering solutions. So if you fall or trip, they rejoice that they are wise.
“See I already told them not to do it.”
As a Buddhist, such an attitude is of course a taboo. It is as good as rejoicing at another’s suffering.
Try not to participate.
Afraid of changes
Negative people perceive risk and danger in new situations or new environment. They believe that things will not work out as planned. They prefer to stick to their comfort zones.
These are the people that always reject changes. It is a sign of grasping and attachment. In Buddhism, we have to constantly remind ourselves to accept changes and impermanence.
Huge ego that is easily bruised.
The root cause of fear is caused by the delusion of self. A negative person is constantly afraid of getting hurt. Their sense of pride is huge and their ego too.
Their ego can extend to include the organization or company or religion that they belong to.
Due to this huge ego, they are hyper sensitive to criticism. An innocent gesture or remark by others maybe perceived as an insult or a slight.
Summary
It takes a lot of effort to change a negative person because they cherish their perspective. Unless they achieve a breakthrough in themselves (A.k.a Realization) it is almost impossible to change.
The next best thing, is to protect ourselves and have compassion for them. How can someone live with so much negativities in their live? In order to do that, we must recognise such negativities when they arise. Do not be influenced.
Finally, we have to check ourselves and make sure we are not negative and hampering another’s happiness.
